Car Jokes

A fellow bought a new car, a Nissan, and was quite happy with his purchase. He was something of an animist, however, and felt that the car really ought to have a name. This presented a problem, as he was not sure if the name should be masculine or feminine. After considerable thought, he settled on an naming the car either Belchazar or Beaumadine, but remained in a quandry about the final choice. "Is a Nissan male or female?" he began asking his friends. Most of them looked at him pecularly, mumbled things about urgent appointments, and went on their way rather quickly. He finally broached the question to a lady he knew who held a black belt in judo. She thought for a moment and answered "Feminine." The swiftness of her response puzzled him. "You're sure of that?" he asked. "Certainly," she replied. "They wouldn't sell very well if they were masculine." "Unhhh... Well, why not?" "Because people want a car with a reputation for going when you want it to. And, if Nissan's are female, it's like they say... `Each Nissan, she go!'" [No, we WON'T explain it; go ask someone who practices an oriental martial art. (Tai Chi Chuan probably doesn't count.) Ed.]

Aliquid melius quam pessimum optimum non est.

Der Horizont vieler Menschen ist ein Kreis mit Radius Null - und das nennen sie ihren Standpunkt.

Ego sum ens omnipotens.

Forsan et haec olim meminisse juvabit.

Hodie natus est radici frater.

Honi soit la vache qui rit.

Klatu barada nikto.

Mieux vaut tard que jamais!

Qvid me anxivs svm?

Raffiniert ist der Herrgott aber boshaft ist er nicht.

— Albert Einstein

Regnant populi.

semper en excretus

SEMPER UBI SUB UBI!!!!

sillema sillema nika su

Suaviter in modo, fortiter in re. Se non e vero, e ben trovato.

Sum quod eris.

Tout choses sont dites deja, mais comme personne n'ecoute, il faut toujours recommencer.

— A. Gide

Verba volant, scripta manent!