Like other occult techniques of divination, the statistical method has a private jargon deliberately contrived to obscure its methods from non-practitioners.

— Ashley, G. O.

Like dreams, statistics are a form of wish fulfillment.

— Baudrillard, Jean

Statistics are no substitute for judgment.

— Clay, Henry

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

— Disraeli, Benjamin

I could prove God statistically.

— Gallup, George

Round numbers are always false.

— Johnson, Samuel

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.

— Knebel, Fletcher

He used statistics as a drunken man uses lampposts; for support rather than illumination.

— Lang, Andrew

I will stand on, and continue to use, the figures I have used, because I believe they are correct. Now, I'm not going to deny that you don't now and then slip up on something; no one bats a thousand.

— Reagan, Ronald

A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.

— Stalin, Joseph

There are two kinds of statistics, the kind you look up, and the kind you make up.

— Stout, Rex

Statistically, the probability of any of us being here is so small that you'd think the mere fact of existing would keep us all in contented dazzlement of surprise.

— Thomas, Lewis

There are lies, damned lies, and statistics.

— Twain, Mark

Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lamp posts... for support rather than illumination.

— Unknown, Source